Tag: hip fracture

welcome to girlfriends with aging parents

selling my parents house – long distance

Selling Mom and Dad’s house long distance was a nightmare!!  I had the interior repainted and re-carpeted.  I had new landscaping done, etc.  I moved 60 years of accumulation out of their house and cleaned, repaired and fixed up the place. At the same time I took care of my crippled mother with Parkinson’s and a father with a hip fracture, cancerous lung and brain tumors and Parkinson’s dementia to boot) and got the house on the market by Sept. 1st.  The house sold the first day on the market (unheard of in this economy) because I way underpriced it. Frankly, I couldn’t stand the thought of driving to Portland every weekend in the winter to check on heat and water pipes, etc. Three hours one way was just not in the cards for me! Talk about stress….

The lesson here would be that if you have gotten to the point where you know you can’t handle the details of getting your home ready to sell then it’s probably too late.  Try to move into a condo or retirement facility before you fall apart physically.

Hope that helps.  I guess now I have to swallow my own medicine.  I know all of the above will happen for me sooner than I care to admit.  I just hope I can graciously acknowledge it and do something about it when it’s at my doorstep!  Anything you can add?

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getting life in order – early

safety deposit boxA few of the things that would have given me a smoother transition into the caregiver role for my parents would have been a more gradual relinquishing of their medical, physical and household responsibilities.  Dad’s hip fracture (unfortunately) was the incident that set in motion their immediate and full dependence on me.  I have a brother, but he has created only more work for me.  I know most elderly folks living independently don’t feel the urgency to begin relinquishing financial control when they can still seem to manage it all, but I do think when we are in our 70′s that it is time to have all of those pieces of the puzzle completely in order, so that the transition is smooth and easy for our children.  Maybe not easy breezy, but at least not a major headache!  For starters, downsize to no more than three or four accounts, get POA’s in order on all accounts, Social Security, Medicare, etc.  everything that has money or personal privacy issues must has POA on file or you are out of luck!

I would also be certain that by my 70′s all my important documents are safely tucked away in a safety deposit box:  will, financial account records, birth certificate, marriage license, copy of insurance cards and policies, most recent tax statement, passport, funeral papers, etc.  Be sure the executor of the will has the extra key or code to this box!     Can you share your wisdom, please?

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